A is for Apathy

It’s no great secret that, in the past year or so, my hobby has not been a smooth ride.  Since the playtest for Malifaux 2^nd edition, I have bounced around various game systems looking for something to fill the void.  I have tried good games like X-Wing (good game mechanics but a huge lack of in-game narrative and hobby side of things) and bad games like 40k (unbalanced rules, soulless minis and half the community are douchebags).  Despite looking everywhere even remotely interesting, I have failed to find something to hold my attention.  Recently the closest has been Empire of the Dead, the minis are simple but easy to paint quickly to a decent standard, but the lack of character and the GW derivative rule set (although the fluff is decent, it reads like a Malifaux rip off at times) rules it out as a possible main game.

So where exactly am I going with this, is it just going to be another “Mack Martin stole my hobby” rants?

Over the past few months I’ve become increasingly apathetic towards gaming and the hobby in general, my enthusiasm has been almost zero for any involvement.  This apathy has very much been reflected in recent Soulstone Train episodes, they have been few and far between with my vocal presence much reduced (more than ever I’ve just sat in the corner with a drink).

And now to the point.

For a while I’ve been considering what the hobby means to me and why I got involved in the first place.  To me a hobby is something that you derive pleasure from and at the moment, that is not true for me.  After much thinking, I have decided that once my current commitments have been met, I’ll be taking an indefinite break from the hobby.  To be perfectly honest, at the moment I’m expecting that break to be permanent.  This will of course also mean the end of SST as I arrange the recordings, edit it and pay for everything.  As the core mechanics are complete, I will continue to develop Liberal Crime but it will purely be as a creative outlet (fluff writing, etc), it may well be released in the future but at this point I really don’t know.

I’ve met a lot of great people through the hobby (and a few complete c**ts) and I hope to continue those friendships without the gaming backdrop.  I may come back at some point but if not, assume you’re the reason and strive to be a better person.

Stalled or just plain stopped?

It's no great secret that I'm not a quick painter. Even with 3-4 months notice, I still used to struggle to get a set of 6-8 models painted for a Malifaux tournament. Part of this speed problem is I have nerve damage in my arms that sometimes means I can't hold a brush, my job also has a tendency to encroach on my hobby time. The main factor however is motivation, or more accurately the lack of. I used to use the run up to a tournament to force myself to make progress, it wasn't always as enjoyable but it got things done.

A few months ago I bought starter boxes for a number of different games, amongst them was the vampire box for Empire of the Dead. Since purchasing said box, it has sat unopened on a table in my nerd cave. The main reason for this box staying shut is simply that the miniatures didn't look that good in comparison to the other stuff I bought. When lined up with minis from Bushido, Freebooters Fate and Carnevale, there is a very noticeable difference in the level of detail. The EotD minis reminded me a lot of the 90s GW sculpts for fantasy and Mordheim, put simply they looked dated. I bought that box mainly because I'd heard good things about the ruleset so I wasn't that bothered about the minis.

For some unknown reason, that week I had the urge to open that box. I got everything built and started tickling them with a brush. Shockingly, a couple of days later I've finished two of the eight minis in the box and have already ordered another. I've even found myself trying to steal a few minutes painting time before work because I've been enjoying it so much.

I don't know if the EotD minis are simpler as an artistic choice or they just couldn't afford a digital sculptor but whatever it is, I hope Westwind (the makers) keep doing it as they're an absolute delight to paint.

Having completed two miniatures in the space of a few days, I was curious how many I'd painted so far this calendar year. The answer is a mildly shocking four, including the two painted this week! I may have started work on a fair few things but essentially finishing two models in the first half of the year shocked me.

I have tried to force myself to paint 40k stuff and to be honest, I have not enjoyed that time in the slightest. I've found GW models to be soulless and bland to paint. Now that I have a bit of motivation back, I am quite looking forward to putting a brush to some of my infinity stuff but that'll be after my EotD stuff is finished.